I know that I am not alone in this, but sometimes I like to subject myself to sad songs or stories and just cry. I don’t know if the tears are cathartic or if I feel it’s a bit of emotional penance but it happens from time to time. I don’t think men do this… could you imagine it: “Hey, Bob. I just needed a good cry last night so I popped in a DVD of “Apollo 13″ and got it all out.” Tee Hee.
At the wedding this past weekend, the Bride and her father danced to Steven Curtis Chapman’s “Cinderella” and I was just weeping and that song has been running around and around my head. I don’t know if it’s because I have daughters or what but I look at them and I can’t believe how much they have changed in such a short amount of time. The Bear is starting preschool in a month and The Dragonfly is practically walking. How do we deal with the enivitable? After all… eventually a baby will be my last baby.
Jesus tells us not to worry about the future as all will be taken care of for us, but tell that to a mother who, in looking at baby pictures of her children, feels time flying past, slowing for no person. My question, I guess, is how do you deal? Is it something that just happens?
Looking back, I remember when I was in middle school and high school, not imagining that I would ever be ready to leave home. My mother was my best friend, my hero and I couldn’t imagine not being there. But that summer before leaving home for college, I was ready. I was ready to strike out on my own, knowing that I could always come home. In college, I fantasized about being married but again, couldn’t really imagine making a life with someone as intimately as the one with my husband, in starting a family.
So maybe that’s how Life happens; maybe that’s how God takes care of us. We are not expected to adapt to change rapidly, rather over time. When my girls don their prom dresses, I’ll be ready. When they flip their tassels at graduation, I’ll be ready. When they dance with their daddies at their weddings, I’ll be ready. And when I hold grand babies for the first time, I’ll be ready.