Tag Archives: lactivist

How Formula Marketing Came to Be: A Bit of Satire

Scene: The year is 1939. War is raging in Europe We are in a high-rise office over looking the big city. It’s late. There are two men sitting inside, wearing suits and ties and smoking. Because, after all, smoking is cool. 

Man 1: So, so, so! (Slapping Man 2 on shoulder) How’s fatherhood treating you?

Man 2: The boy is great! He’s quite the little man, I’ll tell you. Strong, happy but you know what? He takes up all of my wife’s time.

Man 1: (Guffawing) And that’s a bad thing? Take my wife, please!

Man 2: No, I am serious. Every time I look at her, she’s holding him or playing with him or cooing at him or feeding him. He’s only three weeks old, but it’s as if he’s more important than me! The feeding is the worst part… those used to be my toys. (He looks wistfully out the window.)

Man 1: But she’s still fulfilling her wifely duties, right. After all, that’s her job too.

Man 2: (makes a rude noise) NO. Because whenever I start in on her, that baby starts crying or smacking his lips and she’ll push me off to “comfort” him. And when he finally does go to sleep, she tells me that she’s (takes on a whining tone) “tired” and “doesn’t want to be touched anymore right now.” Fine. I won’t touch her, but I have needs too, dammit! (hits the table with fist.)

Man 1: Wow. That baby’s taking over everything. You can’t even touch your wife anymore. (starts laughing)

Man 2: You know it would be just better if there was a way for her not to feel so worn out. I think it’s all the milk the baby takes from her. He’s sucking on her every two hours.

Man 1: You know, that sounds familiar… hold on there, sport. (takes a drag of his cigarette and walks over to a paper-strewn desk. Begins to rifle through the papers.) Here it is! This was submitted a few weeks ago and I didn’t know where to go with it. It’s for an artificial infant feeding mix.

Man 2: How’s that?

Man 1: According to this, it’s based in evaporated milk and has a bunch of other stuff thrown in. I don’t know the science, I am just supposed to sell the stuff.

Man 1: Who’s it for?

Man 2: It’s supposed to be for mothers who can’t make their own milk, but it’s just not selling.

Man 1: If I could get some of that to my wife, I might get her in bed once in a while. I mean if that evaporated milk stuff is as good as her milk and it can buy me some time with her, I am all about it. When is the ad campaign due?

Man 2: (Takes another drag.) It’ll be tight. I have to make the pitch in 2 weeks.

Man 1: OK, let’s work on this. Because you know that  am not the only man out there cast out like a dog because of the baby. We need to figure out a way to make the regular way of feeding seem inconvenient and lower-class. We need to make this stuff sound futuristic and better because it’s made in a factory. How about this, we spin it so that we “Dads” can get more involved (snorts) because we can “help feed the baby” giving our wives more time for themselves! Do you think they’ll buy it?

Man 2: We’re smoking aren’t we? People will buy anything if you sell it right.


OK, yes, this was a little satire…  but for a little history: From Wikipedia:

In parallel with the enormous shift (in industrialized nations) away from breastfeeding to home-made formulas, nutrition scientists continued to analyze human milk and attempted to make infant formulas that more closely matched its composition.[4] Maltose and dextrins were believed nutritionally important, and in 1912, the Mead Johnson Company released a milk additive called Dextri-Maltose. This formula was made available to mothers only by physicians. In 1919, milkfats were replaced with a blend of animal and vegetable fats as part of the continued drive to closer simulate human milk. This formula was called SMA for “simulated milk adapted.”[10]

In the late 1920s, Alfred Bosworth released Similac (for “similar to lactation”), and Mead Johnson released Sobee.[10] Several other formulas were released over the next few decades, but commercial formulas did not begin to seriously compete with evaporated milk formulas until the 1950s. The reformulation and concentration of Similac in 1951, and the introduction (by Mead Johnson) of Enfamil in 1959 were accompanied by marketing campaigns that provided inexpensive formula to hospitals and pediatricians.[10] By the early 1960s, commercial formulas were more commonly used than evaporated milk formulas, which all but vanished in the 1970s. By the early 1970s, over 75% of babies in the United States were fed on formulas, almost entirely commercially produced.[4]

When birth rates in industrial nations tapered off during the 1960s, infant formula companies heightened marketing campaigns in non-industrialized countries. Unfortunately, poor sanitation led to steeply increased mortality rates among infants fed formula prepared with contaminated (drinking) water.[19] Organized protests, the most famous of which was theNestlé boycott of 1977, called for an end to unethical marketing. This boycott is ongoing, as the current coordinators maintain that Nestlé engages in marketing practices which violate the International Code of Marketing of Breast-milk Substitutes.

I read something somewhere and it much more succinctly sums up the whole breastfeeding/ formula feeding debate. While breastmilk is superior, Formula is not bad. Formula has helped countless babies over the years who otherwise might have fared worse. Formula Marketing is the problem.

Now, people could say that breastfeeding doesn’t need to be marketed, because it’s always there, but what does need to be marketed is how breastfeeding is a normal activity and not sexual and not deviant. We need to market that if you want to breastfeed your child, and you need help, find help and we need to market where that help can be found.

When I was pregnant with The Bear in 2006/7, I remember on my first office visit walking out with a book about fetal development and formula samples. No information about La Leche League or other breastfeeding support groups, nothing. On one of the later visits, when I made my breastfeeding intentions known, I walked about with the “Just in Case” sample bag with the cute little “Breastfeeding Kit” tag. It was a shoulder bag filled with formula samples… just in case I needed it. Again, nothing on breastfeeding support.

Why do moms fail with breastfeeding? Because they don’t have help and they don’t know where to find help. I chatted with a young mom at the park last week. She had a four month old with her and she nursed baby for one month. When I told her I was a volunteer working with nursing moms, she told me that she stopped nursing because baby would choke, cough and pull off whenever she tried to nurse, so she thought that something was wrong with her milk! (Any thoughts as to what was going on? Sounds a bit like oversupply to me.) Had this mom been with a group of  other breastfeeding moms she might have been able to nurse her baby a little bit longer, maybe even to her goal of six months.

I know that it sounds like a radical departure for a self-professed lactivist, but again… formula in and of itself if not bad. But the marketing sure is. And I am sure that sexually-deprived ad men are not to blame for formula marketing, but it does make for an interesting plot device, no?
Tomorrow is the last day to enter to win “The Invisible World!” Click here to find out how to enter. I’m drawing the winner tomorrow!!

Pax Christi!


Filed under breastfeeding, fathers, feminism, food, funnies, wednesday

Top Ten Things to say to encourage a nursing mother

It’s Time for another List!! Part of me is thinking about making Thursday my “List Day.” My post about breastfeeding this week kind of got me thinking about some of the other “booby-traps” that moms run into, and negative comments tend to be right up there. Honestly, I think it’s because people just don’t know what to say to a nursing mom. Here’s an idea: Just talk to her like you would any other mom. The fact that she is nourishing her child with breastmilk shouldn’t sway your conversation (and that applies if she is nursing right next to you or just nursing in general.)

Top Ten Things to Say to Encourage a Nursing (or Any) Mother

10. You are doing great!

9. What can I do to help you out right now?

8. Can I make you dinner tonight?

7. Would you like a glass of water?

6. You been nursing for (2 weeks, 6 weeks, 8 months, 3 years)? Congratulations!

5. Nurse where ever or how ever you are most comfortable.

4. Your baby looks very happy/content.

3. Any amount of breastmilk your baby receives is fantastic for his health.

2. Formula and Breastmilk can work together, it doesn’t have to be ‘all or nothing.’

1. I am here if you need me, even if it’s just to listen.

I know that it sounds kind of counter-intuitive, coming from a self-professed “lactivist,” but I have really been thinking about why I began breastfeeding and why I wanted to help other mother’s breastfeed. I believe that breastmilk is superior to formula but I am also a realist knowing that not all moms will make the choice to stay home with their children (or that it is financially feasible.) So if I mom decides that pumping her milk for while she is away is too much of a hassle and would rather use formula when she is away, that is what works best for their family.

But there is the flip-side, I do believe that more should be done to remove some of the barriers that impede the efforts of nursing mothers. I mean, you figure if a mom wants to nurse her child exclusively for 9 months and goes back to work when the baby is 3 months old, she’s requiring time to pump for 6 months. When that comes up, all of a sudden there are calls about how it’s not fair that this mom has to have:

1.) time to pump

2.) a private location to pump that’s not her car

3.) storage for the milk (optional)

I think back to when I was working (before teaching) and our workplace was smoke-free, when the smokers could go out willy-nilly to have a “smoke-break” in addition to their mandated breaks. Did I think that it was fair that me, as a non-smoker, didn’t have that luxury? No, I didn’t think that it was fair, but to be honest, I was happy that I wasn’t saddled with a nicotine addiction, so it was a wash. But we have to remember, fair does not mean equal.  When I was teaching, I used an easy way to illustrate this: Is it fair that I have to wear glasses while my BFF has perfect vision? No. Should I stop correcting my vision or should she wear corrective lenses so we are equal? No.

When my DDs were little, they both wore a cheeky one-sie that we bought in Chicago. It read:

” Thank You for not giving my parents unsolicited advice.”

I think new parents are so bombarded with advice, that they forget to follow their God-given instinct. Mothering is hard enough as it is and we make it harder by always wanting to either out-do each other by being the “better mother” or by thinking that somehow we are doing something wrong because we are not following the latest expert advice to a “T.”

But I think the best thing you can say to any mother is:

You baby/ children is/ are beautiful and you all look very happy.

And that’s music to any mother’s ears.
What’s the best or worst advice you received as a new mom, nursing or not? Share below!!

Pax Christi!


Filed under breastfeeding, family, fathers, feminism, lists, mothering, Thursday

The Accidental Lactivist

I was chatting with some girlfriends after my Spin class yesterday, and I told them how over the weekend, we decided to, and successfully, night-weaned The Dragonfly. I told them that I was most impressed that it was not as traumatic as I had made it out to be as well!

For those of you who do not know, we are a family that practices extended breastfeeding and bed-sharing, and many of my lady friends, with whom I was chatting, do not. Some still hold onto beliefs that both practices can be harmful to the child’s psyche, either in the short- or long-term, but I like to acknowledge both practices (but extended breastfeeding especially) as some of my most effective parenting tools. And if I may say so, my girls are great! Now, The Bear (DD1) was night-weaned fairly early in her life (we started out child-rearing a little more traditional. She was in a crib and night-weaned before she was a year. With DD2, we changed it up a bit. Part of it is the scientist in me, wanting to see which methodology is more effective, I guess,) so I didn’t know how it would be night-weaning a toddler who could, very vociferously, protest when she disagreed. Friday night, as she was nursing after bath, I explained to her that her “milkies were going night-night, too.” Overnight, we did have frequent wake-ups and attempts to nurse and one little bit of crying, but she was cuddled and was reminded that the milk was sleeping like she was. Around 3am, however, she woke up and would not go back to sleep. I almost caved. I sang, I rubbed her back, I snuggled… nothing. (You might be asking yourself, where is the MIster? Well, he was not traveling, but he snores incredibly loud and, for now, is sleeping in the guest room until we figure out this snoring. My original plan did include MY sleeping in the guest room and him night weaning her, but he gently reminded me that as soon as we returned to normal sleeping arraignments, I would have to address her as well. Begrudgingly, I relented, knowing he was right.) I heard the Mister get up around 4a (we are early-birdies here, in fact I started working on this at 530a) and by 545a, I shuffled out with her and explained the deal. He took her and I crashed for another 2 hours. Saturday night was that much better, no long stretches of wake time in the middle of the night, just a few reminders of the milk being asleep and we’ve just improved from there. It’s Wednesday morning and we didn’t wake up at all last night. But back to the story…

So, I am telling this tale to my girlfriends, and batting away the negativity with my sword of knowledge when one of the ladies (who, for the record is not a “rah-rah-breastfeeding mom,” like yours truly, pipes up. She says, “I don’t really see the big deal. My DD is 5 and still takes a sippy-cup to bed with her to drink during the night, how is that different from nursing at night?”

Well said, accidental lactivist, well said.
Pax Christi!

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Filed under breastfeeding, mothering, wednesday

A Song for Mama’s Milk: April Carnival of Breastfeeding

Welcome Carnival of Breastfeeding readers! This month’s theme was “Extended Nursing.” This is an older post that I’d written on the subject but it is still applicable.  Be sure to check out the links to all of the other participants and their thoughts about nursing toddlers at the end of this post. Enjoy and Happy Reading!! – Karianna

The other day, The Mister and I stumbled across the movie “Grown Ups.” What struck me about this movie was not that it was a mindless comedy with a revelation-for-the-good-of-the-family at the end, but that it featured a four-year-old nursing. As I am watching, I am thinking, “This could be fantastic! The beginnings of normalizing extended breastfeeding.” Of course, I was sorely disappointed. The breastfeeding scenes, while few, were met with jokes and ridicule and one ill-mannered four-year-old, demanding “I WANT MOMMY’S MILK!” What?! Is it too much to expect that Hollywood would treat extended breastfeeding with courtesy and respect? I guess that it’s easier to make fun of it since every one else does.

I am the mother of two daughters, both of whom would qualify as “extended breastfeeders.” The Bear will be 4 in July and weaned at 30 months. The Dragonfly will be two in September and is very much in love with nursing. The girls tandem nursed until The Dragonfly was three months old. At that point, this mama was pretty much done with tandem nursing. I asked The Bear if she would mind if Mama’s Milk was only for the baby. She looked at me at said, “Sure! Can I have some yogurt please?” And with that, my nursing relationship with the Bear was complete and, to be honest, she was still just a baby in my eyes.

Breastfeeding is one of my most cherished parenting tools. What do I do if the Dragonfly falls and hurts herself? Nursing makes it all better. What if the Dragonfly is having a rough day? Let’s take a moment and nurse. How about this one? Mama is stressed out and kids are getting on her last nerve? Let’s stop, nurse and reconnect. What if she’s sick and can’t keep solids down? Breastmilk’s got it covered. How about those “picky eating” phases, do I reach for a nutritional supplement? Nope, breastmilk is all that we need. The life of a toddler is all about exploration and discovery. Sometimes that exploration can get overwhelming and discovery can consume many free moments in the day. Nursing allows time to rest and for your excitable toddler to just be a baby once again.

But, extended breastfeeding isn’t culturally accepted or the norm. Why is that? Why is a child considered young enough to breastfeed at five months but too old by nine months? Why do we pressure mothers to begin solid foods at 4 months even if baby is not showing readiness signs? Mothers who nurse past one year or even two years are accused of being too attached to their kids or even worse, abusing them. They are told that what they are doing is “gross” or “twisted” or that breastmilk doesn’t have any benefits past twelve months. Really? Is that where we are in the 21st Century?

One of my favorite moments during the day is when The Dragonfly comes up to me, and says “Muk, peas!” We sit down to nurse, with tickles and giggles to boot. Near the end, she stops, looks up at me and says emphatically, “Done!” Every time it makes me laugh and then she laughs and runs off to resume playing. There is nothing weird or strange about extended breastfeeding. To the child, it is just another way of knowing that they are loved. We may cluck out tongues or look disapprovingly at a toddler or preschooler walking around with a bottle or pacifier, but we don’t ever think that the parent is somehow hurting the child. Why wouldn’t the same hold true for the nursing relationship?

I just finished reading A Song for Nagasaki: The Story of Takashi Nagai by Paul Glynn and there is a moment in the book that really exemplifies the extended breastfeeding relationship. I will warn you though, it may make your eyes well up… especially if you are a parent. (Spoiler Alert! If you are currently reading the book or planning to, you might want to stop reading the blog here. This scene is toward the end of the book.) The book is a true story about a man and his family living in Nagasaki before, during and after the dropping of the A-bomb on the city. The narrator is a father, talking about his daughter, after the bomb killed his wife:

“It is nighttime, and I am in bed in the hut with four-year-old Kayano in my arms. She is drowsy and almost asleep but instinctively reaches under my shirt and takes hold of my nipple. With a shudder, she realizes it is not her mother’s breast, and that her mother has disappeared. Suddenly, she is awake and sobbing.”


Make sure to visit the other Carnival Participants!

Elita @ Blacktating: The Last Time That Never Was

Mama Poekie from Authentic Parenting: Extended Breastfeeding

Mama Alvina of Ahava & Amara Life Foundation: Breastfeeding Journey Continues

Diana Cassar-Uhl, IBCLC: Old enough to ask for it

Judy @ Mommy News Blog: My Favorite Moments

Tamara Reese @ Please Send Parenting Books: Extended Breastfeeding

Jenny @ Chronicles of a Nursing Mom: The Highs and Lows of Nursing a Toddler

Christina @ MFOM: Natural-Term Breastfeeding

Rebekah @ Momma’s Angel: My Sleep Breakthrough

Suzi @ Attachedattheboob: Why I love nursing a toddler

Claire @ The Adventures of Lactating Girl: My Hopes for Tandem Nursing

Elisa @ blissfulE: counter cultural: extended breastfeeding

Momma Jorje: Extended Breastfeeding, So Far!

Stephanie Precourt from Adventures in Babywearing: “Continued Breastfeeding”: straight from the mouths of babes

The Accidental Natural Mama: Nurse on, Mama

Sarah @ Reproductive Rites: Gratitude for extended breastfeeding

Nikki @ On Becoming Mommy: The Little Things

Dr. Sarah @ Good Enough Mum: Breastfeeding for longer than a year: myths, facts and what the research really shows

Amy @ WIC City: (Extended) Breastfeeding as Mothering

The Artsy Mama: Why Nurse a Toddler?

Christina @ The Milk Mama: The best thing about breastfeeding

TopHat @ the bee in your bonnet: From the Mouths of Babes

Beth @ Bethstedman.com: Extended Breastfeeding: To Wean Or Not To Wean

Callista @ Callista’s Ramblings:  Pressure To Stop Breastfeeding

Amanda @ Postilius: Nursing My Toddler Keeps My Baby Close

Sheryl @ Little Snowflakes: Tandem Nursing- The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

Zoie @ Touchstone Z: Breastfeeding Flavors

Lauren @ Hobo Mama: Same old, same old: Extended breastfeeding

Tanya @ Motherwear Breastfeeding Blog: Six misconceptions about extended breastfeeding

Jona (Breastfeedingtwins.org): Breastfeeding Older Twins

Motherlove Herbal Company: Five reasons to love nursing a toddler

Pax Christi!


Filed under breastfeeding, family, life, mothering, wednesday

Everybody plays, everybody wins.

Last week, Elita at Blacktating.com wrote a post about an upcoming book that came across her desk. (She works for the library system and is therefore, even more of a hero to me.) Anyway, the book is entitiled: Is Breast Best?: Taking on the Breastfeeding Experts and the New High Stakes of Motherhood. I am not going to discuss the book here because Elita does a good job on her page, but I am going to give my hypothesis as to why we are still dealing with these mommy wars.

Now, mind you, I am not a social scientist and everything that follows is essentially out of my head but bear with me here. I am thirty years old (born in 1980) and if you are my age, or younger, you might remember the phenomenon of “Everybody plays, everybody wins.” (In fact, it might still be happening.) The basic idea was, in the realm of sports specifically, every child on the team got a chance to play and everybody got a trophy. The basis of this was the question of how losing would affect a child’s self-esteem and it seemed to have been determined that the self-esteem of children is so fragile that it must be protected from any hits at all costs. But let’s look at the fruits of this labor:

-Helicopter Parents: We have a whole generation of parent afraid of letting their kids make mistakes or getting hurt that they will hover near by and swoop in as soon as a danger (real or imaginary) presents itself. Now, don’t get me wrong, if your kid is in bodily harm- swoop, swoop away, but if your kid is over the age of 18… it’s time to stop swooping.

-I know a woman who is a Nursing Professor, teaching graduate level nursing courses here in Missouri and she has had to field irate phone calls and emails from the parents of her students (mind you, this is graduate school so these students are at least 22 years old.) These phone calls are usually to discuss/ argue against bad grades. Because of the privacy act, the professor is not allowed to discuss the grades with the parent, but that does not sway them.

-Many people, my age or younger, are afraid of making mistakes because of the Everybody plays, Everybody Wins mentality and as a result, we have the Mommy Wars. We have a group of parents who grew up being told that they could do no wrong and that they were perfect in every why that when they encounter a teaching or philosophy that is counter to their own held beliefs the effort is put forth to discount/ disprove that counter-philosophy.

So, let’s get back to this book:

A big problem people have with pro-breastfeeding campaigns is the notion that “Breast is best” or “Breastmilk is a superior infant food.” The author of the book is taking the opposite approach and defends formula as being just as good as breastmilk, however this assertion is false. Formula is not and never will be just as good as breastmilk. It just won’t. Look at it this way:

Statement A: A potato from the garden is superior to processed, fast food french fries. French Fries will fill you up and keep you from being hungry, but it is not the same as the potato. Manufacturers try their best to make the french fry nutritionally equal to the potato but as close as they come, it’s still a french fry and not a potato.

Can you argue with the above statement as being false? Now, I love french fries and I could eat them at every meal, but of course I don’t because that would not be good for me. So let’s read that statement again with some substitutions:

Statement B: Breastmilk is superior to Formula. Formula will fill you up and keep you from being hungry, but it is not the same as Breastmilk. Manufacturers try their best to make formula nutritionally equal to the breastmilk but as close as they come, it’s still formula and not breastmilk.

While most people would not call statement A false, there would be plenty out there to say that statement B is false, even though the only change was in 2 words.

So, where am I going with this? Breastmilk, Formula, Homeschool, Vaccines, Fast Food, Juice, Wooden Toys, etc., etc., what ever parenting choices you make you have to be confident that you made the right decision for your family. My SIL hated breastfeeding and therefore did not continue very long. My SIL is a strong, confident woman and knows that she did the right thing for her family. But she also knows that formula is not the same as breastmilk and is not going to convince herself otherwise. What is right for my family is not right for my BFF’s family and we need to stop pretending that every family is the same in every way.

But with that said, breastfeeding advocates are not going to stop giving the facts about the nutritional superiority of breastmilk because there are mamas and mamas-to-be out there who are still deciding and discerning what feeding method is right for them and they deserve all of the facts. Maybe what we all need is a little dose of humility and we need to stop trying to be the best at everything. After all, in this life not everybody is going to play and win but once we are with Jesus and get our crowns, all of this stuff will just be noise.

So what are your thoughts? Are you a Helicopter Parent? Was “Everybody Plays, Everybody Wins” a good thing for us? Are we, as parents, just neurotic?

As an aside, this is my 100th post!! If you’ve been reading all along, thanks! If you are a new reader, there are 99 other pretty good ideas to read!

Pax Christi!


Filed under breastfeeding, feminism, life, monday, mothering

Now on Tuesdays! Ask The Caffeinated Catholic Mama

I feel the Holy Spirit’s been after me for a while to do this so I am going to finally stop being stubborn and say “yes.” Starting tomorrow and every Tuesday to follow, I will use my blog space to answer your questions to the Caffeinated Catholic Mama.

So if you have questions about Catholicism, conversion, RCIA, Natural Family Planning, Breastfeeding, Cloth Diapering, Frugal Living, Knitting, Crochet, Biology, Forensic Science, Marriage, Parenting, Gentle Discipline, etc., etc., please send me an email at:

CaffeinatedCatholicMama (at) gmail (dot) com

In your email, please include your first name and let me know if you want your name withheld when I answer your question on the blog.

I will do my best to answer your questions and if I cannot, I will refer to a Catholic’s BFFs for the answer: The Bible, The Catechism and The Priest. (that’s assuming your question is about Catholicism.) Please try to make your questions concrete as I am not so good at the existential questions… after all, my education is in the Natural Sciences!

I have no prizes to offer for your questions other than the knowledge that you might be helping others with their questions!

Looking forward to answering your queries!


Pax Christi!

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Filed under breastfeeding, Catholic, cloth diapers, frugal, life, marriage, mothering, Tuesday

Guess that whole “Dairy State” thing only applies to cows

I am really sad to say, that my only negative nursing in public experiences have come in my home State of Wisconsin. The first happened almost a year ago, and you can read about it here and the second happened this past Saturday at the Beaver Dam Country Club (which, is not as toney as it sounds.) It’s funny. Their motto is “Where Strangers Feel Like Family.” Let me know your thoughts on that one at the end.

Dear Husband’s (DH’s) cousin was married this weekend to a lovely girl he met at Madison. The ceremony was beautiful, held at the Wisconsin State Capital Building. We got there in the nick of time and as a result were seated in the Gallery section, which offered a great aerial view of the wedding plus we were in comfy theatre style chairs which made for easy nursing. After the wedding we headed to the Great Dane for a quick microbrew and then headed up the road to the country club.

There was lots of milling about during cocktail hour and The Dragonfly wanted Mama milk so I obliged while at the tables around the bar. (Wisconsin is smoke-free which I find great, so there was not pesky smoke to bother us.) While we nursed, I chatted with family members and all was good. After cocktail hour, Steve’s Uncle had us all come outside. He is an amateur naturalist and cultivated over 1000 Monarch Butterflies for a butterfly release. It. Was. Gorgeous. It was as we were coming back into the club when it happened.

This schmuck, whom I later found out was the husband of this really nice bridesmaid I met, and he cronies said just loud enough for me to hear as I walked past “There goes the Breastfeeding Queen” in this snide tone of voice. Of course, anger flared up in me but I decided to turn the other cheek rather than confront a drunk idiot. DH noticed my dour mood and asked what was up. Of course, I told him and he was ready to throwdown. DH is not what I’d call a lactivist by any means, but you do not mess with his family. I tried to put it out of my mind, but it’s hard when you are criticized by someone you don’t know over something as innocuous as feeding a child. And, no, I don’t believe that a breastfeeding mother should have to hide away because she is doing something “private.” Peeing is private. Eating is not. And to be honest, more breast is seen in Abercromie and Fitch ads or on the beach or at the mall than what I was showing in breastfeeding.

The Dragonfly only nursed three more times while we were there and DH decided to stay at my side for those nursings. He later told me that the bartender was not too appreciatve of my breastfeeding in the bar area as he kept of shooting me dirty looks. Sorry dude. I wasn’t going to nurse in the dining area because we were thisclose while eating. Seriously, my FIL was 4 inches from my left and my SIL was 4 inches from my right and the chair behind me was… yep, 4 inches behind me. The Dragonfly is now about 28 inches long… kind of tight. Now granted the actions of the bar keep are not indicative of the club but still…

I love my home state and I know that the actions of a few do not a reputation make but I really feel for moms who maybe aren’t as confident in their nursing. What would she have done when faced with such scorn? Formula feeding moms want to know why breastfeeding moms have to be all up in arms about breastfeeding in public and this is why. No one thinks twice about a mom bottlefeeding and the same should be said for breastfeeding.


Pax Christi!


Filed under breastfeeding, feminism

Wordless Wednesday: Mama Milk (WBW: Day 4)

We were fortunate enough to witness this tender moment between a mama pony and her baby foal at Schopf’s Hilltop Dairy Farm in Door County, Wisconsin.



As this is WBW, my posts this week will reflect this. In addition, use my blogroll visit other blogs that celebrate breastfeeding and the joy that comes from it. Make sure you check them out! Also, the 8th Edition of The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding is out. This edition has been revised since 2004 and it. is. awesome. Seriously.

Pax Christi!

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Top Ten Worst Things about Breastfeeding (WBW: Day 3)

Because I fully believe in equal representation, I feel it’s only right to compile my Top Ten Worst Things about Breastfeeding to balance yesterday’s post about the Best things.

10. Sometimes I really have to think about my fashion choices for the day

9. Waking up in a puddle of milk is never fun

8. Three words: Random. Milk-ejection. Reflex.

7. When parents hustle their children away from me, like I am a pariah, when I sit down to breastfeed at the park.

6. The look of pity, followed by the look of disapproval, when I say “No, she’s not sleeping through night.”

5. Teething

4. Needing a breast pump if I am away from baby for more than 4 hours

3. Engorgement

2. The sad , puppy-dog face my husband gives when he can only look and not touch

1. Explaining to people that, yes, my baby is still nursing at 3 months… 6 months… 9 months… 12 months… and beyond.


I am sure you have some personal points to add to this list! Do share!

As this is WBW, my posts this week will reflect this. In addition, use my blogroll visit other blogs that celebrate breastfeeding and the joy that comes from it. Make sure you check them out! Also, the 8th Edition of The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding is out. This edition has been revised since 2004 and it. is. awesome. Seriously.

Pax Christi!


Filed under breastfeeding, mothering

World Breastfeeding Week: Day 1

Happy World Breastfeeding Week (WBW)! Every year, runs from August 1-7 and every year, my family finds itself in beautiful Door County Wisconsin for our annual vacation. We are blessed in that my In-laws live up here year-round and therefore, it’s a fairly cheap vacation. Long car ride, but surely worth it.

This year, our travels were a little bit easier in that The Bear was already up North with Grandma and Grandpa and leaving only three of us traveling the 10+ hours from St. Louis to the Door Peninsula. For those of you wondering how you make long car rides and frequent nursings work, without stretching your car ride by hours and hours, I present a step-by-step guide to breastfeeding in motion:

1. Sit next to your rear-facing little one. If you have motion sickness, like I do, make sure you have a proper emesis catching receptacle handy. I personally like Target bags.

2. Stretch your seat belt as far as it can go, all the while reminding your husband not to crash the car. I find you have to repeat that phrase over and over… kind of like a mantra. If you are a praying type, as I am, you usually start praying for safety at this point. A few “Hail Marys” and “Jesus, please don’t let my husband crash” are favorites of mine. If you can’t stretch your seat belt, you may have to unlatch the belt and increase the frequency of said prayers.

3. Channel your inner contortionist and latch baby on. If you are larger breasted, you will have the advantage of not having to lean so far over baby, if you are smaller breasted, you’ll get a great oblique workout. Remain in this position until the feeding is done or baby drifts off.

4. If you are traveling during the day and don’t have tinted windows, be sure to wave to the curious on-lookers and truckers. You might have just made their day.

5. Repeat as needed. And for me… that’s most of the trip. In fact, other than driving from St. Louis to Lexington, IL, I spent the duration of the trip acting as human pacifier #1.

I am sure you are thinking, wouldn’t having a bottle just be easier? Sure… but where would the truckers get their entertainment from?

As this is WBW, my posts this week will reflect this. In addition, use my blogroll visit other blogs that celebrate breastfeeding and the joy that comes from it. Make sure you check them out! Also, the 8th Edition of The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding is out. This edition has been revised since 2004 and it. is. awesome. Seriously.

Pax Christi!


Filed under breastfeeding, eco-friendly, feminism, funnies, mothering