Tag Archives: tuesday

Confessional on a Tuesday

I’ll admit, I really like it when bloggers write out their confessional posts. Confession really is good for the soul and while confessing little bits about yourself in a blog for the enjoyment of your readers is NO MATCH for the Grace that flows from a true Reconciliation for someone is a true state of Sin, they are still a little fun. We all have our idiosyncrasies and sometimes you have to talk about them.

Without Further Ado:

1. I really enjoy Young Adult novels.
2. I have never read nor seen a Nicholas Sparks book/ film inspired by a book.
3. Last month I ate cooked peas for the first time.
4. I schedule out my days.
5. Red Wine contributes to my migraine headaches, but I still have a glass here and there.

6. “Breaking Dawn” was the first Twilight film I saw in the theatre.
7. I enjoyed the Twilight books.
8. I tend to dress in neutrals because I am too lazy to match colors.
9. I let the 4 year old leave the house dressed in what she picks out.
10. Usually it’s a hot mess.

11. I am considering wearing a head covering outside of the Mass.
12. Yes, I am serious.
13. In our house we have 2 iPads, 1 iPhone and a MacBook… and a Blackberry
14. 90% of the time, DH and I are in the same room whilst on computers.
15. I like Shamrock Shakes.

16. I realize that writing is narcissistic work, and I see the irony in being a Catholic blogger trying to work on her pride.
17. I love eggnog lattes.
18. I hate stuffing/ dressing.
19. When my girls pretend play, coffee is always involved.
20. I’d take Alan Rickman over Hugh Grant ANY DAY.
______________________________________________________________________________________________________


Advertisements

Leave a comment

Filed under lists, Tuesday

Teaching the Teacher Tuesdays: The Space

I have finally taken one more step toward getting our homeschooling started! Yesterday, I headed out to make photocopies of the worksheets that I want to use and I created this nifty little focus board for our teaching space.

There is a space for our Virtue and Verse of the Week, The Theme of the Month, Calendar information, and the Letter and Number of the Week. The handouts that we are using are basic letter, number, color, shape and pattern handouts from a book purchased from the store.

I am planning on teaching on Monday, Wednesday and Friday for 2.5 to 3 hours total and I think I have enough activites to fill our day, but I am still trying to find easy crafts for the girls (Pinterest has great ideas for larger, more complex crafts but not too many easier ones.) I’d like our crafts to be reflective of the letter, number, verse/virtue or season so that does open up lots of options.

The Bear is still working on completing the markers for her chore chart as well. Since one of the virtues that we want to foster is responsibility and I am a bit tired of doing EVERYTHING, we are in the process of giving her a visual for the things that she needs to do daily to help the house run. In addition to getting herself ready (brushing teeth, getting dressed, etc.) she also needs to make sure that her room is picked up and the table is set for meal times.  We are not planning on any type of reward for completing her responsibilities but we ARE thinking about a positive reward system for her exhibiting positive virtues… like playing nicely and not pinching her sister in frustration. I’ll keep you updated.
______________________________________________________________________________________________________
What does your Homeschool space look like, if you have one? What would your ideal space look like, if you decided to homeschool? What is needed in a “good” space? What are you thoughts on positive reinforcement for good habits?


3 Comments

Filed under Catholic, family, Homeschool, school, Tuesday

Teaching the Teacher Tuesday: Nothing more precious

Today was our first full day here in Pasadena and it will remain in my mind as the most memorable first days ever in a new city. On the way to Costco, with the girls, I was involved in an auto accident.

First of all: We are all OK. The airbags did not deploy and the girls were giggling afterward with the Bear saying how “fun” it was. I wish the same thing could have been said for me. With adrenaline rushing through my veins, I did what most people would have done… I cried and then called my husband. A pair of witnesses called the Police and they arrived within 10 minutes to file the report. I was able to drive the van back home and now we wait.

I’ve had a couple hours to process what happened… after all, I have been driving for 15 years and this is my FIRST accident (I’ve never even received a speeding ticket!) and let me tell you, this was the scariest thing that I have been though… especially when I imagine it could have been that much worse. Sure, my Swagger Wagon is damaged and looking very sad and not drivable for any sort of distance. Until we get a rental car, I have no way of getting around Pasadena on my terms (short of walking.) Our auto insurance will go up and I no longer have the luxury of bragging about my spotless driving record (but I still have the no tickets thing going for me.) But: WE ARE ALL OK.

Both girls were in 5-pt harnesses and The Dragonfly was still rear-facing, even though she is over 20 lbs and over the age of 2. I have been a stickler about keeping her RF-ing as long as possible, despite my husband’s (and others’) protestations/ questioning. Keeping your child rear-facing adds a level of protection that is unsurpassed and it all has to do with anatomy and physics. I wish The Bear was still RFing but her beast of a CRS is FF-only (Britax Regent. It’s 50 lbs without a child in it.)

Before the age of 3-4, it has been found that the vertebral column in humans is more on the flexible side (if it helps, we are born with more with over 300 bones which fuse over time to make the 206 in the average human.) This makes sense when you consider that during birth, the neck has to flex to make it through the birth canal. But because of that, the necks of infants and toddlers remain very flexible:

If the infant is facing forward in a frontal crash–which is the most common and most severe type–the body is held back by the car seat’s straps, but the head is not, explains Kathleen Weber, director of the Child Passenger Protection Research Program at the University of Michigan Medical School. While older children and adults wearing safety belts may end up with temporary neck injuries, a baby’s immature neck bones and pliable ligaments can allow the spine to separate and the spinal cord to rip, says Weber.

Basically, she’s saying that a child can internally be decapitated because the vertebrae and ligaments will stretch but the spinal cord will not. Some of you out there may be thinking to yourselves: Well, we (have car seats/ weren’t rear facing/ didn’t wear seat belts/ sat in the front seat, etc, etc) when we were growing up and we turned out just fine.” To that I have to ask: Were you involved in an accident in which those safety measures would have been employed? Most people will answer “no” which affectively renders their argument moot. If you haven’t been in an accident, what you grew up doing has no matter.

Another concern I often hear is one that I used with our first. She was rear-facing only until about 18 months, because I felt that her legs were getting too cramped in that position. (We were driving a car that didn’t allow the seat back to recline.) The way I look at it now, I’d rather risk broken legs than a dead child.

When all is said in done, the Swagger Wagon will be repaired, we will have two new 5-pt. harness car seats (after an auto accident, seats must be replaced and the old ones rendered inoperable,) and I will struggle with the guilt of what I could have done differently. My mind has been filled with “what-ifs” all day: What if I’d just stayed home? What if I’d waited until after rush hour to venture out? What if I had just gone to the market by our house rather than trying for Costco in Burbank? But at least the one “what-if” I don’t have to deal with is “What if I had left her Rear-Facing?”

For more information here is some light reading.
___________________________________________________________________________________________
To my friends and family: I am sorry that you are reading about this on the blog rather than my calling you, but I feel that this is a message that needs to get out ASAP. We’ll talk soon.


6 Comments

Filed under family, infant mortality, mothering, travel, Tuesday

Teachin’ the Teacher Tuesday: Education via Childrens’ Programming

There are two things that I do not do well:

1. Handle Change (and I am not talking money)
2. Ask for Help.

The Children’s Programming Channel that we favor in our house really likes to change things up. Shows will change time slots or disappear all together. It doesn’t seem to bother my kids, but let me tell you… it drives me up the wall when things just move. And I’ll admit… it’s not just programming changes that bug me, it can be anything that upsets my status quo. It would drive me nuts when different actors come in to play established characters, I can’t stand it when I have a plan in my mind and then we have to deviate from said plan. I think that’s why traffic really gets to me, because you can’t plan for traffic. Ugh. My husband loves to joke around that his personal version of Hell would be me and his father in one room, planning something and dealing with the inevitable change.

Another thing I don’t do well with? Asking for help. I know that I am not alone in this and I really can’t explain why it’s so hard to ask for help and the converse, why it is so hard to accept help when it is offered? My friends know me very well and they have actually started asking if I need help with specific tasks or even giving me a specific solution for my quandary.

So, our children’s televisions programming station debuted a new (random to me) program and irony of ironies, the lesson being taught today was about asking for help when you need it.

Thanks, birdies.
_________________________________________________________________________________________


1 Comment

Filed under family, funnies, travel, Tuesday

The best laid plans…

I don’t know if you are reading The Modern Mrs. Darcy, but if you aren’t, you really should be. A few weeks ago, Anne wrote about the importance of writing every day, for bloggers, as inspired by Eleanor Roosevelt. I have heard that advice before, but I’ll tell you, it’s so much easier said than done. I mean, there are some days that I would LOVE to write, but I have NO CLUE what to write about!

Many bloggers have memes that they follow or take part in, or they are part of a collective, so I thought that it might be a good idea for me to come up with my weekly schedule of general topics for each day of the week, Monday through Friday. I am an extremely structured person, so this is more for me than it is for you, but if it means more writing… it’s a win-win for both of us!

So this is what I am thinking:

Monday- Modern Manners: Etiquette and Good manners are not just for the well-off or elite. It’s for everybody! I really love all things etiquette, in fact, I own quite a few etiquette books but none by Ms. Post! Gasp!

Tuesday- Teaching the Teacher: Dun. Dun. DUN!! I am going to be homeschooling The Bear for her 4 year old Preschool Year. Join me on Tuesdays for all of the planning, teaching and learning fun! (Psst… homeschool moms/ dads, I will LOVE your input here!)

Wednesday- What I’m Reading Wednesday. This will be anything from interesting books to fantastic links that I have stumbled upon or have been introduced to.

Thursday- Tasty Treat Thursday: This was my day for lists, but I am kind of running out of steam with the lists, and this is the best alliteration to meld Thursday and Recipes. But that’s what we’ll be doing on Thursdays… fun recipes with pictures, hopefully, but no promises!

Friday- Seven Quick Takes: I’m sticking with the Seven Quick Takes Party over at Conversion Diary!

SO, there you go! We’ll start out with this plan… how about tomorrow with a What I’m Reading Wednesday? Sweet!

Oh, one more thing, HAPPY 200th POST TO ME!! Thanks for reading, especially those of you who have read all 200 posts!! Love you!
___________________________________________________________________________________________


2 Comments

Filed under Tuesday

I’m a Barbie Girl…

So… I have this old Glamour Magazine Subscription that I have had for years and whenever I get a new issue, I find myself practically busting blood vessels out of frustration at the content. I first subscribed to Glamour back in the 90s because it, to me, was the anti-Cosmo. Cosmopolitan was all about “Do this to please your man” or “try this to make him moan,” basically making women into drooling, fem-bots whose only goal in life was to please their partner of the night. Glamour was different… it was empowering women to go out and make something of themselves and rule the world. Glamour still has that at it’s heart, but it seems to have morphed into Glamour’s wanna-be tag-along friend.

Glamour still writes about the hard hitting issues, but it usually involves women in “those other” countries. Women facing brutality because of religion, Female Genital Mutilation, Women getting torched because their husbands don’t want to be married to them any more, etc, etc. But then it will turn around, and white-wash serious issues that their readers may be facing. Some of the things in the September issue that just pissed me off:

pg. 266 Talks about the Birth Control that your OB/GYN uses (IUD.) Explains how it works with respect to sperm motility/ sperm environment. Where it is placed, how effective they are, price, if your guy will feel it and how it feels getting the piece inserted, but NOTHING about the SIDE EFFECTS or who SHOULDN’T use one! From American Pregnancy Association:

An IUD should NOT be used by women who:

  • Have or ever had cancer in the uterus or cervix
  • Have unexplained vaginal bleeding
  • May be pregnant
  • Have pelvic inflammatory disease
  • Have a history of ectopic pregnancy
  • Have Gonorrhea or Chlamydia.
  • Are not in a mutually monogamous relationship

Potential side effects from using an IUD include:

  • Mood changes
  • Acne
  • Headaches
  • Breast tenderness
  • Pelvic pain
  • Cramping (copper IUD)
  • Increased bleeding during menstruation (copper IUD)
  • Nausea

Emphasis mine, because if you have read a Glamour or Cosmo, you know that a mutually monogamous relationship is NOT the norm.

pg. 274 Article is titled: “Everything you don’t know about your Lady Parts… but Should!” and had a pic of a nude, from the waist down, woman holding a rose at her mons pubis. Pg. 277 starts a series of questions from readers about their “lady parts.” Because Vagina is too much to say. And has pictures of subliminal vaginas (even one in an orange cross-section.) One question in the section was about vaginal discharge and how it changes throughout your cycle. Now, I know that not everyone is anti-birth control like I am, but wouldn’t this be a great jumping off point to even mention Natural Family Planning? But it’s probably better that it was not… back to the whole monogamous relationship thing. The closest they came was to say that, “after you release an egg, discharge gets cloudier and thicker. ‘All the better for catching and trapping sperm, which your body naturally wants to do.'” Wait… my body is giving me natural cues that aren’t masked by synthetic hormones?? No. Way.

There is a redeeming factor in the “Lady Parts” article. Have you heard of “The Barbie?” Yeah, me neither, before I read this article. The Barbie is a type of female genital cosmetic surgery in which the total labia minor (the inner lips of the vulva) are surgically removed. WTH?! But it gets better, doctors can continue on and remove the fatty mons pubis (the mound you see when you look down at your toes and you are nude) via liposuction and the prepuce of the clitoris (protective skin around the clitoris.) Thank You, Porn Industry.

In case you were wondering, the World Health Organization defines Female Genital Mutilation as “all procedures that involve partial or total removal of the external female genitalia, or other injury to the female genital organs for non-medical reasons.” If it walks like a duck… and sounds like a duck…

Pg. 375: The Piece de Resistance… The number one thing HE wants in bed. “Fellatio, blow jobs, going downtown, giving head…” The article goes on to talk about how great it is and how empowering it is and how only “10-20% of women felt disgusted or bored by it.” The article runs about 2 pages long, with a nice Red Rocket popsicle melting for a graphic along with “Blow Job Milestones in History,” but only a narrow side bar about the RISKS associated with Oral Sex. Hmmm.

So, yeah. Glamour I am so over you, but at the same time, shame on you for filling the heads of tweens, teens, and twenty-somethings about how this is what an empowered woman looks like. In your pages, female empowerment means sleeping around (just make sure you have the “right” birth control,) getting your dues at the office (but don’t be a b*tch about it,) and doing it all (as long as you keep him happy in bed.) Thanks, but no thanks. I’ll stick to my Good Housekeeping.

(But I will say, without Glamour, where will some of my posts come from?)

___________________________________________________________________________________________


3 Comments

Filed under feminism, political, Tuesday

Welcome to the World, Cazimir Kolbe!

This past Sunday (Aug 7) I took part in what has to be the one of the most amazing moments of my life, and it totally changed the friendship that I have with one of my BFFs.

My friend’s husband is overseas for the time being and as a result wouldn’t be able to be here for the birth of their third child. Earlier this Spring, my friend called me and asked me if I would consider being her birth partner for this child’s birth. I didn’t have to think twice, of course I would! She and I have been friends since 2007, I met her at a La Leche League meeting right after I moved here to St. Louis. The Bear was almost 4 months old and she was expecting their first child that month. She helped our family find our Parish and she and I really hit it off right off the bat. Through the years, our friendship has been through highs and lows, through births, through moves and changes, but our friendship has only changed for the better.

Early Sunday morning (around 230a) she called me and told me that she was going to have the baby today. I dressed, grabbed some stuff and drove to her house. Her doula and I arrived at the same time and we helped her labor at home until 530a. We arrived at the hospital around 6a and this is where things got a little fun. (Just a little aside, the staff working in ERs really need to cut back on the caffeine! My friend’s water hadn’t broken yet, but she was having intense contractions… to the point where she had to stop walking and concentrate on the contraction. Labor was not imminent in the fact that the baby wasn’t going to fall out of her right then and there, but the staff added a little unneeded stress to the situation by basically chiding us for not getting to the hospital “sooner.” Anyway.) We get to Labor and Delivery and get my friend set up on a birthing ball. Now, she and I have the same OB/GYN, a fantastic man who is a great husband and a father of 7, but he was on-call at another hospital until 7a. If you have given birth, you know how particular one can be about “your” OB delivering the child. So, my friend labored and worked through her contractions all the while praying for Dr. G to get there.

My friend had made it clear to me and her doula and in her birth plan that she wanted to have a non-medicated birth, and that she would ask for pain meds when she wanted them. But here’s the funny thing about birth, if you are going natural, the moment you think you really want those meds means that you are probably closer to time to push than you think. So, she was checked and sure enough, she was 8cm and 80% effaced. After another 20 minutes of work, she asked for an epidural again and the orders were put through… at least they tried to put them through. The hospital had just switched over to electronic filing and there was a little issue getting the meds ordered. By the time the order had come through, her water had been broken (the sac was bulging, bulging but wouldn’t rupture) and she was feeling the urge to push.

She pushed through a couple contractions while on the ball and then decided to move to the bed. During the next contraction, the doula and I checked and sure enough… we saw hair! The doula pressed the call light for the nursing staff (another aside and a reason why I LOVE this particular hospital… if you are having a non-medicated birth, the nurses really do not come in much. They will come in to check fetal heart rates every so often but other than that, they are pretty hands off. I just wish they had birthing tubs) and Dr. G and the nurses came in. My friend pushed another 6 times or so and my godson, Cazimir Kolbe, was born! (For those trying to keep track, from the time we arrived at the hospital to when he was born was 2 hours.)

The Post-Birth-Happy-High set in pretty quickly for my friend (another upshot to the non-medicated birth is that the after birth endorphins aren’t blocked by pain meds) and she was so amazed at her body that she not only had a son but that she birthed her son without the aid of an epidural or pitocin! She couldn’t believe how great she felt and how “fast” it worked. I know that feeling because I felt that same way after birthing The Dragonfly. It seems as soon as they place that baby on your chest, you completely forget about the previous time that you are working and exhausted and that you thought you couldn’t do it anymore.

For me, the experience really enforced, in my mind, how childbirth should be. Childbirth is an event that can unite a couple, but even more so, it is an event that unites women across time. My friend is not kidding when she says that our friendship has changed because we have been to the edge and back together. I looked into her eyes and I saw the moment when she had to let everything go and trust her body and trust her support team to walk with her to the end.

And it was amazing.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Pax Christi!

2 Comments

Filed under family, life, mothering, Tuesday

Age ain’t nothin’ but a number… isn’t it?

Einstein taught that time is relative so as an extension, age must be as well. And if you think about it, it really is.

On any given day, I don’t perceive myself to be any older than the girl that I was when I was eighteen, or twenty-two, or even twenty-eight, but the signs of the slow deliberate march of time are undeniable. For me, it’s the little things, a little crinkle in the corner of my eyes from years of smiling; saddlebags, that despite meters and meters of side lunges and a fairly healthy diet just will not go away; graying hairs. But I have encountered two things recently that just make me feel old.

One, there is a new station here in St. Louis called “Gen X Radio,” and it plays songs made popular for and by Gen Xers. Now, as a kid growing up in Milwaukee, I remember WKLH always talking about playing the hits from the 60s, 70s and “today.” Now the music from “My Generation” (with a nod to The Who there) is on a totally separate radio station, separated from Top 40, and is a beast of its own. And you want to know what? I. Love. It. Now, I won’t listen to it when the girls are in the Swagger Wagon, only because… well, I’m that mom who really doesn’t want her daughters singing “If you wanna be my lovah.” (Spice Girls, there.) But if I am driving solo, you know that I am rockin’ out to No Doubt, , Everclear, Green Day, Color Me Badd, BBD, Madonna, Goo Goo Dolls, Lifehouse, etc, etc.

Two, right now, DH is watching the Encore Mini-series “Moby Dick”. So, I am half-watching it. I tried reading Moby Dick a few times, but just couldn’t get into it. I do know that the retail chain “Starbucks” took it’s name from a character in the novel, Mr. Starbuck, though. But that’s not my point. Well, it kind of is, you see, Ethan Hawke plays “Mr. Starbuck,” and I remember as a kid thinking how cute Ethan Hawke was. Same thing would go for Christian Slater or Denzel. But now I noticed something different about Mr. Hawke and the ilk, and here’s the thing… they are still cute actors, but when you look at them, they look… old.

So does that mean that I soon will become that mom embarrassing her kids?

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Pax Christi!

Leave a comment

Filed under life, Tuesday

Minivan Mamas vs. SUV hotties

I don’t know if this is a US thing or what. But what you drive seems to “say” a lot about you. And if you are a parent and unless you are only planning on having two offspring, you eventually have to have the discussion:

Minivan or SUV?

And as strange as this may seem, this seemingly inocuous decision will propel you into another world of cliques and groupings where the vehicle you drive can lead others to make snap decisions about you.

On the one hand you have the minivan:

Dude. I can haul a whole basketball team, plus their crap and not wrinkle my outfit!

A vehicle that screams “MAMA ON THE ROAD!” (after all it’s no coincidence that the minivan in “Cars” was voiced by a matronly sounding actress,) they are large, kind of cumbersome and despite all of the revamping and restyling by auto designers, they are essentially large boxes on wheels, but oh! The storage! Being able to haul lots and lots of crap around in your vehicle does seem to be a requirement for any mama. And the slidey doors! You know there are some parking lots that have not been repainted to make up for our ever widening vehicles, and there’s something to be said about slidey doors.

On the other hand you have the SUV:

Hey there. I may never go off road, but I guarantee, if I do, I’ll look so much better than you while doing it.

A vehicle that coyly winks and whispers “Yup, I’ve had kids but I’m still as hot as I was in high school and I haven’t given up!” These vehicles too, are large and cumbersome and some of them tend to roll over at inopportune times and are strangely box shaped as well. The storage is not as great as in a minivan, but when you are paying through the nose, who cares about storage? (and I am lumping crossovers in this category as well. Frankly, I don’t quite get the appeal of the crossover, but that’s just me. After all, it’s really an SUV on a car platform, right?)

I’m a car! No, I’m an SUV! So, I’m a car? Someone help me out, please?!

But here’s the thing… ask a young mother her opinion of minivans and you will most likely get the same answer over and over again, “Ugh. I will never drive a minivan!” I know this because I once uttered those same words. In fact, I was seriously looking for an old skool Buick Roadmaster or some other station wagon that could fit more than 5. Yeah, no luck there. But once The Dragonfly was born, things started getting a little cramped in our Passat. Now it wouldn’t be so bad, but we travel to Wisconsin a few times a year and it’s a good 12 hour drive. And if you are going for some time, you have lots of crap with you. Plus, we like to keep the kids rear-facing at least until 2 or close to that, and let’s just say that we were snug.

So we started our research. My in-laws drive a Tahoe (they live in Northern Wisconsin and have dogs) and I had the chance to drive theirs. I won’t lie, it was nice… being up so high, above all of the cars, but the Environmental Science teacher in me had a hard time rectifying the gas guzzler. I had always dreamed about the Volvo XC70, which to me is more of a station wagon than a crossover, and you can get three car seats across in it, but that’s a little out of our price range. And if we have more than three, then we are in the same pickle. So, that left us with the Minivan.

But you want to know what? I could look at myself as a Minivan Pretty Young Thing (MPYT from here on) because my vehicle, to me, is not a status symbol, but sometimes characterizations are cool. It is a mode of transportation for my family. I’m a MPYT in Spin class with all of my SUV hottie counterparts, and I am equal to them in every way, excepting that I most likely didn’t pay as much for my vehicle. Just because I drive a minivan doesn’t mean that I have to give up drinking my Gin and Tonic or my Scotch or my champagne for White Zinfandel or Wine Coolers. It doesn’t mean that I have to exchange my dresses and skirts for high-waist elastic jeans and a Cat Sweater. It doesn’t mean that I will leave my house without a stich of makeup and my hair up in rollers. I know all of this is true because,

I am not defined by my car.

Whatever you drive, don’t obsess over it. Your car does not make you who you are. In fact, unless they are a pedestrian, or parked next to you in the lot, no one should really be looking at you while you are in your car. No one is better or worse because of the vehicle they drive, as every family needs to figure out what transportation strategy is right for them. Sure, the SUV hotties seem to get more head turns as they speed by but you know what? There is only one man’s head I want to turn and it usually does when I make a lane change a little too aggressively.
_________________________________________________________________________
What do you drive? Do you feel as if there are unspoken cliques surrounding vehicle choice, or is this just another battle in the foolish Mommy War?

Pax Christi!

5 Comments

Filed under family, funnies, Tuesday

How we became engaged

Ah, Miss Hallie over at Betty Beguiles has issued another invitation, this time to share engagement stories. She is such the romantic and it’s great because I am kind of a cynic so she pulls the romance out of me. LOL! OK, so the story of how the Mister and I came to be:

Scandal Alert! I actually met the Mister when I was dating another guy. I was in my first year of Graduate school and I had joined a Karate School to get some exercise in, other than my daily run on the ‘deadmill’ and weights. The relationship I was in was nice but I guess he just wasn’t the right one for me. This guy was the second that I had EVER broken up with and it was the hardest thing to do in my life because he was the perfect man, just not perfect for me.

So, the Mister and I had been dating for about 2 years when I started getting antsy. OK, I’ll be honest. I was getting jealous because “everyone” else around me was getting engaged and married. For me the big crux was when HIS BFF proposed to his girlfriend after less than a year of dating (now the caveat is that THEY had been friends for about six years before they moved into the relationship rhelm, but I chose to ignore that fact. Yes, I was pouty-face.)

It was January 2005 and I was set to graduate from Grad School in May. In August 2004, the Mister had moved to Chicago to take a job and so we were doing the long-distance thing, me in Madison WI, him in Chicago. We would see each other on weekends, but that’s about it. I was interning at the State Crime Lab, but knew that after graduation I was most likely going to be moving to Chicago as well. The Mister was coming up that particular weekend as he had scored tickets to see “The Phantom of the Opera.” I had never seen the production and I really wanted to see the film with Gerard Butler and Emmy Rossum and The Mister decided that I needed to see the actual show before seeing the film version.

Before the show, we had dinner on the Capital Square and then walked over to the Overture Center on State Street. It was January in Wisconsin, so it was cold and I opted not to wear a coat, but it was a short walk. We get inside and get to our second row seats and sit down and the show starts. I am absolutely enthralled! I know that it is so gauche to like Andrew Lloyd Webber Productions, but I do, so there. The Mister was a little annoyed, however, because there was a couple behind us that kept talking throughout the entire first act. He decided to talk to the usher at intermission to see if anything could be done but as the show was sold-out, there was nowhere for  us to go, but the usher did give the couple a stern talking to.

Once the show was over and we were all filtering out, I was on cloud nine. I really enjoyed the production and really felt for the Phantom. We walk out of the Overture center and the Mister decides that we should go for a cocktail. I agree and start powerwalking, again, because it’s cold and I don’t have a coat. Now, on this particular weekend, they were having a cross-country ski competition AROUND the Capitol Building, so we were relegated to one side of the square. As we were walking, the Mister kept telling me to “Slow down!” and I would call back “No, hurry up! I’m cold!” Once we came up next to this cute little Episcopal Church on the Square (Grace Episcopal if you know the area) he gave a slight tug to my arm to stop me.

He stepped in front of me and said:

“OK, I kind of lied about “Phantom” being a birthday present. I wanted to make tonight special because you are the most important person in my life and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

Then he gets down on one knee, in the snow, and says:

“Karianna, will you marry me?”

Of course I say yes, and I start to cry (which I never thought that I would do) and I start telling random passers-by that I just got engaged. We called friends and family (not to mention that it was close to midnight, but who’s counting?) We did get our cocktail (extra-dry gin martini for me, Johnny Walker Blue for him) and the rest as they say is history! (And let me tell you, it’s been a great history, present and looking forward to the future!)

What was kind of funny is that he had the engagement ring (as pictured below) in the glove-box of his car for a few months before the proposal! He drove up to Door County Wisconsin to pick it up when he dropped me off at my friend Jen’s wedding shower! A brave one he is.

__________________________________________________________________________________________
Head over to Betty Beguiles for more engagement stories or to share your own!

Pax Christi!

2 Comments

Filed under family, history, marriage, Tuesday