My 2012 Goals

It’s said that if you put your goals into writing, you actually manage to accomplish them. I am taking a page of blog-speration from Anne @ Modern Mrs. Darcy (and if you aren’t reading her blog, you should be!) and here are my 2012 goals:

Financial

Spend less, bring in more– I am still working my Thirty-One business and I am hoping to expand more. I have a pretty good sized display kit, so I am really going to try to stop the excess shopping. I have kicked my previous retail demons, and since we are living in such a great climate, I can play outside with my kids rather than head to the den of temptation (aka the Mall.)

Get that emergency fund established. Enough Said.

Writing

Determine and Perfect my Blog Niche– Right now I write about a whole gamut of ideas and I have been thinking of trying to streamline it a bit more, to focus.

Begin actually writing my YA novel– instead of just planning and re-planning and re-planning

Write an ebook– I talked to a friend a few years back about writing a book and this might be the right platform for it!

Become Self-Hosted– It might run me about $10/ month for blog hosting, but it might earn me a bit more cred.

Health and Wellness

Kick Sugar– for good this time

Start Jogging again– There is this pin on Pinterest that really reflects my feeling towards running. But a second hand double jogging stroller is less expensive that a gym membership, and the loop around the Rose Bowl Stadium is about 3 miles (just about 5K.) Spend less.

Work on my flexibility– there is a Bikram Yoga place near us, but I might just get a few Yoga DVDs instead. Again, spend less.

Personal Mental Wellness

Get my budding friendships established– Make some “momma-only” dates with the ladies that I have met here

Meet other Spiritually focused At-Home Moms at our Church– there is not a mother’s type ministry at our Parish, so I think the Holy Spirit has been kind of pushing me to start something… Maybe Mass Readings at the Park or something.

Get out once a month for some alone time– Just a date with me and a coffee cup

Re-establish Friday Night Date Night– for a bit, DH and I were having Friday Night Dates at home and they need to come back. Maybe even take some Tango lessons…

Reading

Actually finish reading Anna Karenina and The Lord of the Rings.

Work Crossword puzzles again.

Craft

I have decided to let my Etsy Shop go to the wayside. I started listing my baby hats, longies/soakers and fascinators at the peak of their popularity and I don’t like the extra pressure of having the shop stocked.

I will continue to work of my lace knitting techniques. There are some BEAUTIFUL patterns for lace shawls out there and I’d love to try them out. Plus I have some new blocking wires that I can’t wait to use.

 

Let’s see how far I can get on that list this year! What are your goals for 2012?

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Seven Quick Takes Friday (Vol. 19)

1.

Yesterday, I had the lucky occurrence to join the thousands of people who have dropped their mobile phones into the toilet. It was in my back pocket and flipped out. Mad Skillz.

2.

If you ever have the misfortune of dropping your phone into water, throw it into a bag of white rice ASAP. The rice will act as a desiccant and help to draw the water out of the device. Then start your Internet search on what to do next. Most will say, leave your device in the rice for 2-3 DAYS. Like I said, mad skillz.

3.

I usually don’t make New Year’s Resolutions, but I am going to take a stab at them this year. I resolve to read The Lord of the Rings and Anna Karenina, all the way through. With both of those books, I make a valiant effort and get started… and then… just… peter… out.

4.

DH and I are debating “camping” out for the Rose Parade. We are not allowed to occupy Colorado Blvd until 11a the day before (so Jan. 1 since the parade is being held on the 2nd due to city regulations,) however. Plus, I don’t know if an all night party with a 4yo and a 2 yo is really the best idea.

5.

DH was very generous this year and if you are on my Twitter feed, you know that I was the lucky recipient of a Dyson Vacuum. Little did I know that this marvelous piece of engineering would bring out some inner OCD tendencies and make my house cleaner than it has EVER been.

6.

At Christmas Eve Mass, the cantor was this amazing 13 year old (my guesstimate.) Her final communion song choice was “O Holy Night” and she nailed it. Then… everybody clapped. In fact, the people in front of us pretty much jumped out of the pew. OK, what’s the big deal? Clapping at Mass, for me, is a pet peeve of mine and I find myself praying about it a lot. Why? For me… when we applaud at Mass, it seems as if we are celebrating the person (the cantor or the priest) for something THEY have done, rather than saving our glory for God or that the Mass would be somehow less meaningful or holy if we didn’t have “performers.” Opinions on the matter really varied on my FB page, and then someone sent me the Holy Father’s view on applause during Mass.

7.

“Wherever applause breaks out in the liturgy because of some human achievement, it is a sure sign that the essence of liturgy has totally disappeared and been replaced by a kind of religious entertainment. Such attraction fades quickly – it cannot compete in the market of leisure pursuits, incorporating as it increasingly does various forms of religious titillation.” (Pope Benedict XVI)

Word.

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Be sure to head over to Conversion Diary to read more Seven Quick Takes!

Things that I know

I may never have over 1000 twitter followers

I may never have over 1000 “likes” on my FaceBook page

I may never be invited to a big blogging conference

I may never be a popular “mommy blogger”

But I do know…

that for my husband, I am his Complement

that for two little girls, I am their first example of God’s love for mankind

that for my friends, I am as Christ to them and they are as Christ to me

that there is nothing wrong with having faith, in a world full of pain

that as a broken person, I am more than happy to lean on the crutch of Christ

And to steal from Aaron Neville and Linda Ronstadt, “…that may be all I need to know.”

(Image from Danyso.blogspot.com)

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Seven Quick Takes Friday (Vol. 18)

1.

A few weeks ago, I contemplated wearing a head covering everyday when I went out, rather than just at Mass. The thought being, if we are called to pray without ceasing, and since woman is called to cover her head when praying, then it follows that (a modest) woman should consider covering her head at all time. Right now it’s still hit or miss with me and it makes a great option when one is having a not so good hair day. (No worries, I do realize that the state of one’s hair should not be a factor.)

2.

Grandma sent this gift to the girls. They will absolutely love it, but I don’t think that the phrase “Pop N’ Lock” was meant to be used in this manner.

3.

One of the first friends I met here in Pasadena happens to be a hair stylist. I took DD1 in for a haircut and DD2 decided that she wanted her hair done too. So here she is, getting her first blowout:

4.

Pardon the blurriness… one of my handmade Christmas gifts to give. It was inspired by something I saw on Pinterest.

5.

Wednesday I talked about my favorite secular Christmas song. My favorite religious Christmas songs are: “Mary, did you know?” “Adeste Fideles” “O Holy Night” and “Hark! The Herald Angels sing.”

6.

Yesterday, my hubs surprised us by coming home at 2:30p. He had us all get ready to go out because he had a surprise for us. This is where we headed and we had a blast!

Seeing the girls on ice skates for the first time was pretty funny. They have these walker-thingies for the little non-skaters to use. I can tell you, I was really glad I took that ice skating class in Grad School!

7.

This is the photo that was chosen for our Christmas Card this year. I wish you all have a very Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Joyous Kwanzaa and Happy Winter’s Solstice!

Be sure to head over to Conversion Diary to read more Seven Quick Takes!

Seven Quick Takes Friday (Vol. 17)

1.

My quick weekend trip back to Missouri was lots of fun. It didn’t allow nearly enough time to me to see a lot of people but I’ve already decided to make another return trip, sometime in the Spring and maybe I’ll take the kiddos with me.

2.

The reason I headed back was to attend the baptism of my Godson, and here I am with one of the newest members of the Catholic Church.

He just looks priestly, right? 🙂

3.

It’s a little over a week until Christmas. Guess who still has not found a gift for her husband. Yup. Me.

4.

The Bear has been pretty clear about wanting a Play-Dough Ice Cream maker and a Barbie “Beetle” for Christmas. She has become enthralled by Beetle cars… whenever we run errands, she keeps a running tally of Beetles. I wonder if I can find a toy Beetle that has not been branded by Mattel?

5.

Yesterday, using some Pinterest-piration, the kiddos and I made Salt Dough Ornaments. I used my KitchenAid mixer to knead the dough together but forgot to prick the ornaments before baking, so some kind of puffed up, but they look pretty neat. We are going to paint them today. You can find the original post, with directions, here.

6.

Yesterday, I started detoxing from sugar. You might think it’s extreme to call it a detox, but that it totally what it is. And yesterday was horrid! I let the girls have a TV day as I just felt ill all day: Headache, shaking, nausea, tired. Today is Day 2 and I am feeling much better. I am not as trembly and my head is not as achy, but not 100%. I am following the cleanse guidelines from here. I know that it’s crazy to start this right in the middle of the gluttonous season known as the holidays, but I like a challenge. Plus, I am really tired of people asking when the baby is due. I. am. not. pregnant. I just look 6 months along because I am perm-bloated and stoppered up. TMI, I know.

7.

Tomorrow, we bake Christmas cookies and make Christmas candies!! I wouldn’t go as far as to call myself a masochist, but I’m starting to wonder…

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Thank you so much for all of your prayers, positive thoughts, cards and gifts! It really did brighten my life in this dark moment. It’s so hard being away from friends and not having a support system (yet!) and it’s great knowing that you are all there!

Be sure to head over to Conversion Diary to read more Seven Quick Takes!

Words to live by, a farewell to Mom

A few people have asked me if I said any words at my mother’s funeral. If you know me well, you know that I did. What I had to say was short, sweet and not without a point. I think I drew a laugh when I walked up there with my iPad, but it’s so much easier than dealing with papers!  Without further ado:

On behalf of my mom and the rest of our family, thank you all for coming here today. You were all affected in one way or another by my mother and I know that she is glad for your being here.

When I was in my mid-twenties, my mother and I had an interesting conversation. It was a conversation about what she would like to happen in the event of her death. Up to that point, our family was no stranger to tragic events and while that was a very somber topic, it had it’s merits.

(A little history: My mother’s youngest brother was found murdered in his home around Thanksgiving. Her younger sister died from surgical complications around the holidays. My brothers lost both of their grandparents… around the holidays, and their father OD’d… can you guess?? Yup. Around the holidays.)

While the details may have changed, there was one point that always remained the same… that she wanted a true celebration of life. No mournful music, no wailing, no gnashing of the teeth. A true party, where people would exchange happy memories, look at old pictures, laugh and have a fun time.

(We ended up having mournful/ happy music. Somehow, the organist made the music mournful. Oh, well.)

She always said she’s prefer cremation over burial because she dreamed of having her ashes sprinkled among the elephants on the African plains. I told her that I’d take her to the Zoo and sprinkle her there and we’d call it even.

In his first letter to the Thessalonians, St. Paul reminds us to:

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s Will for you in Christ Jesus.

We are not called to be overjoyed with my mom’s death but we are called to be grateful for all the ways she left her mark on our lives.

My mother and I had a bit of a strained relationship at times, but I will attest that the last few years have been nothing but joy, with a little exasperation mixed in for good measure.

Maybe 5 years ago, my mother became very interested in family history. She wanted to find out where everyone came from and how we came to be. I remember how excited she would be when a new lead would pop up on her ancestry.com site and she would either call, FaceBook or, her latest joy, text message me. She really missed the closeness of family that she experienced growing up and she began working on bringing the family closer, starting with reigniting family reunions. But, I think you will have to agree that this might be a drastic way to bring the family closer together.

If nothing else, please do not let my mother’s death be in vain. Heart disease is the number one killer of Americans across all ethnicities and accounts for half of the deaths of American women. Heart Disease kills more women than breast cancer, but yet it’s danger is relatively unknown.

To often, we as women put ourselves 3rd, 4th, 7th, or just flat out last on the list but that helps no one. You were put on this Earth for a specific role- one that no one can fully fill. I am blessed to have loving aunts, a fantastic step-mother and a wonderful mother-n-law to lean on in tough times, but they will never fully fill the void my mom left behind. Visit your doctor for a yearly check up, know your numbers, be proactive and don’t become another statistic.

If you have been to a wedding in the last 2000 years or so, you know what St. Paul writes in 1 Corinthians:

For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; than I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

My faith gives me the hope that I will see my mother again, united with He who is Love along with her little brother, little sister, parents and relations until the end of time.

So there you have it.

Little excitement heading my way… tomorrow I am quitting sugar COLD TURKEY. I’ll tell you more about it tomorrow and why I am doing it (basically, I am tired, grumpy and tired of looking 5 months pregnant.) I am preparing my family for the evil beast that could result of sugar withdrawal symptoms. Stay tuned!
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Seven Quick Takes Friday (Vol. 16)

1.

This is my first post since we’ve returned from my mother’s funeral service. As much as we tried to put the FUN in funeral, it was still a bittersweet event. Not only did people tell me how much I reminded them of her, but I’ve realized that my mom was a people collector just like me. She had made so many contacts and so many impressions that the fact that she was gone was very apparent.

2.

Case in point, after the military service at their cabin in the woods (and you could totally spot us city folk from the Nordwoods folk, by the fact that our feet were freezing as it had snowed,) the hubs, my BF and I headed into a bar for a beer. (It’s Wisconsin.) The other bar patrons asked if we were visiting and I told them that I was there for my mother’s funeral. A bit of time passed and one of them said… “Not Stephanie?! You look just like her!” Everyone in that little town knew her.

3.

One thing about funerals are the old pics that get pulled up. Here is a pic of my parents and my grandparents in the 70s.

IDK what gets me more… my dad’s hair and Tom Selleck ‘stashe or his 3-piece suit.

4.

One good thing about the trip is that we were able to introduce the girls to an Old Milwaukee legend… Real Chili!

They had hot dogs.

5.

For me, one of the most touching moments of our trip back was the fact that my husband’s family (Mom, Dad, Brothers, SIL, our niece and nephew,) as well as my dad and stepmother,  all drove over for the funeral. Why? In the words of my MIL: “Family is family.”

6.

Yesterday was the Feast of the Immaculate Conception. To celebrate, we made blue frosted cupcakes.

Can’t really tell in the picture, but the cream cheese frosting kind of took on an “odd” texture. But they were still yummy.

7.

Today, I tried to become an official California Resident. However, since the fact that I needed additional proof that I am an American Citizen was missed (needed to bring in a passport or birth certificate and marriage license) I spent 40 minutes at the DMV for nothing. The other gem of the day? Because we’ve owned the Swagger Wagon for less than a year, we have to pay the SALES TAX difference between MO and CA (even though the van was bought in MO.) That grand total was $1300! To register my car!  The DMV worker *suggested* we wait until after we’ve owned the van for a year to avoid the extra cash out of pocket. Hot. mess.

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Thank you so much for all of your prayers, positive thoughts, cards and gifts! It really did brighten my life in this dark moment. It’s so hard being away from friends and not having a support system (yet!) and it’s great knowing that you are all there!

Be sure to head over to Conversion Diary to read more Seven Quick Takes!

Tomorrow I have a 7a flight out of LAX but I will try to get my “homemade” gifts post out before then.

It’s that time again! Advent!!

I was looking at some Halloween pictures on-line this past week and I noticed a “different” costume on the daughter of my friend. Her little girl was dressed as a Jack-O-Lantern, but she had little Elf Shoes and a Santa Hat on. The caption of the picture said that she was dressed as… The Christmas Creep. Not only was this a cute costume, but it was also very applicable. Think about, September was barely in the books when stores started putting out their Christmas Displays.

I understand that The Christmas Shopping Season is when most retailers make enough money to get into the black, but how are we as parents to handle this creep within our families? How do we keep Christmas as special as it is while we are reminded of it’s presence starting in the Fall? How are we supposed to help our families remember that Jesus is the reason for the season and not getting new stuff? One way that our family does is pretty easy and fun: We celebrate Advent.

I grew up in a black Baptist church and when I was a Junior in college, I converted to Catholicism. Growing up, the only thing that I knew about Advent is that there was a cute little calendar that had chocolates, one for every day leading up to Christmas (My father’s side of the family is German and I attended a German Language Elementary School.) Once I became Catholic, however, I learned there was whole season in the liturgical calendar for Advent. Advent gives us the gift of four week of preparation: preparing our hearts and our homes for the coming of the Christ Child. It is four weeks for us to re-focus on what is most important, getting ready for the bridegroom to come to his bride.

Having two little ones, my husband and I know that we have to keep our Advent activities simple but still educational. It is important to us, as well, to make Advent just as meaningful as Easter, Lent, or Christmas. Some of our favorite Advent activities are:

– The Advent Wreath: This wreath of evergreen branches sits on our dining table and has 4 or 5 candles (1 candle for every Sunday of Advent with an optional candle for Christmas Eve) Three candles are purple, one is pink and the optional candle is usually white. I don’t have to tell you that kids and candles are always a hit. Before sitting down for the Sunday meal, we say one of the “O Antiphons” and light a purple candle. On week 2, we light 2 purple candles, etc. Week 3 brings the two purple candles and the pink (Gaudate Sunday: Time to Rejoice! The Christ Child is near!) and week 4 we light all four candles. On Christmas Eve, we light the white candle in the center, along with the other four and turn off the rest of the lights in the house and dine by candlelight. The candles stay lit though the evening meal and we let the girls take turns blowing the candle out after the meal.

– Advent Garland: This activity is great for preschoolers. First prep a series of purple and pink strips of construction paper along with some tape (you will need 3 purple strips for every 1 pink strip) to make chain garland. The garland follows the pattern: Purple, Purple, Pink, Purple (just like the Advent Candles on your wreath.) Not only does this make a cute Advent decoration, but it also helps to teach pattern recognition in your child!

– Jesse Tree: This activity does take a little more prep on the part of the parents, but you can make it as simple of as elaborate as you would like. The Jesse Tree tradition comes from the passage in the Bible where it talks about Christ coming from the root of Jesse (Isaiah 11:1.) The tree can be just about anything: a bare branch from outside, a tree painted on your window, a hand-drawn tree on a large piece of paper. There are 24 Jesse Tree Ornaments (one for every day of Advent- not counting Sundays, or you can start your tree on December 1 and hang an ornament daily.) We usually hang our ornaments after dinner: we read the bible passage that matches the ornament or tell the bible story and the girls get to hang the ornament. You can either print off Jesse Tree ornaments or you can make them. Google “Jesse Tree” for some additional ideas or images.

This year, Advent begins on November 27 and ends on December 24 and I hope that these suggestions help you to start a few new traditions within your family and to stave off that “Christmas Creep” a little longer!
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Have a blessed Advent!

Seven Quick Takes Friday (Vol. 15)

1.

Fall Ball was last Saturday and needless to say the girls had an absolute blast hanging out with Cinderella, Prince Charming, Tiana, Tinkerbell and Rapunzel. The Dragonfly is already talking about next year!

2.

It seems as if the Milwaukee Co-Sleeping/ Infant Mortality billboards have really hit a nerve in the blogosphere and has even received some national attention. So, now we’ve got lots and lots of people talking about it, but will anything good come of it? I can tell you, most of the ire is coming because of the vilification of co-sleeping/ bedsharing. If would be different if that was the only factor leading to the deaths. Why aren’t we talking about how important it is not to parent while under the influence or why co-sleeping needs to occur on a firm mattress, without fluffy pillows and blankets and not on the couch. I know that “keep your baby in a crib” is the easiest message to get across, but there are also inherent safety dangers to crib sleep: fabric crib bumpers, ill-fitting slats, too small mattresses. Considering it’s been about 2 years since the first controversial anti-cosleeping ads hit the city and we are still “talking” about it shows there is still much to be done.

3.

Thanksgiving is less than a week away and the only plan that we have in place is that we are going to be brining and smoking a turkey. Have I mentioned that we haven’t purchased a turkey yet?

4.

I am a week into the 14-day Heart of Gratitude challenge put forth by Betty Beguiles and I have to share that after a bit of a rocky start (ahem, Sunday disagreement) things really are becoming lots of fun. I find myself looking forward to the challenges and excited to see DH’s reaction. So far, so good! Plus, he’s planning at-home date night tonight!

5.

This week, The Feminist Breeder featured a guest post about the Fertility Awareness Method. Two fantastic things came out of this post:

a. thousands of women found out that NFP is a form of the FAM (just with abstinence rather than condoms)

b. thousands of women found out that the Catholic Church endorses NFP and NOT the rhythm method for spacing children.

Yay for information sharing!

6.

I have to admit something. Despite reading tweets and information pages about the Occupy Wall Street movements, I honestly can’t figure out what the goal is. I mean, like them or not, the Tea Partiers had a pretty clearly stated goal, right? So, if you can help me out, I’d appreciate it.

7.

Read this awesome prayer in the December issue of Good Housekeeping:

“Lord, Grant me the Power to get out of the Shower.”

How many of us have been there, done that?

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Be sure to head over to Conversion Diary to read more Seven Quick Takes!

Tune in tomorrow for my gift guide for the “hard-to-shop-for” in your life!

Maybe that wasn’t the best tactic, after all?

Have you ever entered into a conversation with a loved one, only to have it turn into something very negative?

A while ago, DH and I were talking about Christmas traditions that each of our respective families celebrated when we were growing up. If I had to characterize the differences, it would be best to say that the celebrations in my family where more Christ-centered, while DH’s family was more family-centered. That’s not to say that my family ignored the family aspect of Christmas and it’s not to say that DH’s family ignored the Christ aspect of Christmas, but it is to say that the emphasis was placed differently and we both have pleasant memories of Christmas and want to bring both of our traditions to the plate and meld them seamlessly.

So that’s how the conversation started. It finished not so civilly.

It’s no secret that DH and I are in different places on our spiritual journey, couple that with our personalities and you get a hot mess. According Myers-Briggs typology, I am an ESTJ. If you know me personally, that should not be a surprise. For those of you not well acquainted with me here are some ESTJ characteristics:

ESTJs are practical, realistic, and matter-of-fact, with a natural head for business or mechanics. Though they are not interested in subjects they see no use for, they can apply themselves when necessary. They like to organize and run activities. ESTJs make good administrators, especially if they remember to consider others’ feelings and points of view, which they often miss. (Myers-Biggs description, emphasis mine.)

ESTJs are civic-minded individuals who dedicate themselves to maintaining the institutions behind a smooth-running society. They are defenders of the status quo and strong believers in rules and procedures. ESTJs are outgoing and do not hesitate to communicate their opinions and expectations to others. (Keirsey description, emphasis mine.)

ESTJs thrive on order and continuity. Being extraverted, their focus involves organization of people, which translates into supervision. While ENTJs enjoy organizing and mobilizing people according to their own theories and tactically based agendas, ESTJs are content to enforce “the rules,” often dictated by tradition or handed down from a higher authority.

ESTJs are joiners. They seek out like-minded companions in clubs, civic groups, churches and other service organizations. The need for belonging is woven into the fiber of SJs. The family likewise is a central focus for ESTJs, and attendance at such events as weddings, funerals and family reunions is obligatory.

Service, the tangible expression of responsibility, is another key focus for ESTJs. They love to provide and to receive good service. The ESTJ merchant who provides dependable service has done much to enhance her self image.

ESTJs have an acute sense for orthodoxy. Much of their evaluation of persons and activities reflects their strong sense of what is “normal” and what isn’t. ESTJ humor is frequently centered around something or someone being off center or behaving abnormally. (from typologic.com, emphasis mine)

Also, according to typelogic… Simon Peter was a type ESTJ.

So where does this lead us? Well, DH is not an ESTJ and in fact it would be great if he would find out his typology! But he won’t because he’s not a big fan of that “mumbo-jumbo.” 🙂

But what did I learn?

1. I am not the boss of others.

2. I cannot impose my will on others.

3. Jesus met people where they were. So should I.

4. God is sovereign and has an ultimate plan that I neither need to know nor am obliged to know the details of.

Now, I know all of this, but it does not make it any easier! I see husbands that are involved with their church and are Catholic/ Christian not just on Sunday and I can’t help but think how great that would be for our family if we were truly united in the faith… if only my husband was as on fire as I am for Christ and for His church. But he is not and no amount of talking, chiding, nagging, conversing, suggesting will change that.

Man does not have the ability to change the heart of another… only Christ can do that.

Do we attend Mass at least 98% of the time as a family? Yes.

Is my husband a good man? Yes.

Does my husband believe in the existence of Christ? I think so.

So, why isn’t that good enough?

I blame my personality.
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